Que yo sabía nada, y me perdí en las tinieblas.
(I knew nothing and got lost in the darkness.)”
I have also tried cocaine. This drug, particularly in its notorious “crack” form, is the cause celebre of today. To me, cocaine is an aggressive pusher, a stimulant which gives me a sense of power and of being completely with it, on top of the world. But there is also the inescapable knowledge, underneath, that it is not true power, that I am not really on top of the world, and that, when the drug’s effects have
disappeared, I will have gained nothing. There is a strange sense of falseness about the state. There is no insight. There is no learning. In its own distinctive way, I find cocaine to be as much an escape drug as
heroin. With either one, you escape from who you are, or - even more to the point - from who you are not.
In either case, you are relieved for a short time from awareness of your inadequacies. I frankly would rather address mine than escape them.”